An open letter to my tribe

Dear Tribe,


I’m hungry – but I don’t know what to eat.

I’m unfulfilled – but I don’t know what I crave.

I’ve been engaging in “intentional procrastination”; investing in me so that I can be better for you – after hundreds of hours of training and study I’m now a registered yoga teacher and certified strengths coach (hence why you haven’t heard from me for a while. Head down, bum up ‘n all that).

I’m in a phase of my business where I have so many ideas, and I’m qualified to deliver all of them. But I need to get clear.

I’ve been decluttering my house, manically, so that I can be in clear space to clear my mind.

I’ve met with an intuitive. I’ve talked to friends. I’ve riffed in my journal. I’ve even been talking to crystals.

In the midst of it all I met death head-on and wept for my daughters who had to face the death of their beloved nanny far too young (another reason I’ve been head down).

I know life is short.

I know I’m here to make a difference.

I’ve pledged $1000 to the Rainforest Alliance because it’s time to balance my decades of consumerism out, and because, well, I’ve grown up. Just a bit. (The grey hairs prove it).

I’m trying to be more sustainable: using eco cleaners, even making my own, using sustainable bags when I shop.

I don’t eat meat anymore.

I got a tattoo.

I’ve changed, and it’s terrified my husband. So, we talked. We listened. We connected. We’re witness to each others’ lives: to our growth, development, to our ‘unbecoming’.

I’ve changed, yes: I’m becoming more who I am.

As the quote goes: “Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about un-becoming everything that isn’t really you, so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place.”

My tattoo means Steadiness and Ease, or to put it more poetically: Strength and Grace.

I’m calling on my strength to be true to myself, and the grace to recognize some won’t understand, won’t follow.


But to those who do –


Thank you. I’d like to be of service to you.


To guide you on your unbecoming; to become more of who you are, to step into your light, your power. To awaken your potential: to be not just an incredible mummy but an incredible woman, whatever your path in life.


Exactly how I do this, is yet to become clear.


A friend said to me recently “I’ve been worried about you. You’ve climbed lots of mountains this year”. Yep, but you need to get to the top to be able to see the best way down. I’m at the top. I’m taking in the view. I’m digesting, reflecting. To acknowledge it’s been a hard and turbulent year is a release, and a relief. Now I’m giving myself permission to take time in stillness, for as long as I need, so that I can come down clear, intentional, with strength and grace.


Stay with me. Hold space for me. Talk with me. Being on any kind of brink, or edge, can be lonely. This entrepreneurial edge is, quite frankly, scary. So please, talk with me. Hit reply and let me know a bit about you: what’s your biggest challenge? your goal? your dreams, desires? What would you love most from me: more workshops, yoga, meditations, individual coaching, desire mapping…
I’d love to hear from you. Just one sentence or a whole download; I’m listening.


Post below, on Facebook, or directly to [email protected]. I’m here and I’m listening.


With love,

Tui xx



2 thoughts on “An open letter to my tribe

  1. Tracy de Beer says:

    Gosh I felt like I was reading about myself here…with a major exception! I feel all of the above, a need to give back & a sense that there has to be more to life than the mundane! After all I personally have endured in the last year there is a deep yearning for change. I’ve spend the last few months wondering if it had been mean (the passing of a mutual friend I mean) what legacy do I leave behind & there isn’t one…I Believe 100% that I’m also going through an unbecoming so to speak too…but scares me most is where to next and where do I find the tools to help me be brave enough take the step…every road I’ve been down has ended in a blocked path & the more blocked paths I get the more fearful I am that I will never get to the top of the mountain to be able to see the best path down…I would be ever so grateful in hearing your story and how you managed to build the courage to just do it?

    • Tui Fleming says:

      Oh Tracy, I can only imagine what you’ve endured. One of the gift’s of our Nikki’s parting was meeting you 🙂 One of my core values, identified over 15 years ago, is courage. I think when we are clear on our core values and exactly how it is we want to FEEL, then it’s easier to make decisions, take action (or inaction!). Identifying these takes quiet space, and yes, tools. Journalling is helpful. I find mindful movement and meditation helpful too. My best ideas come when I’m out of society’s ‘fast lanes’, and in nature, so I take myself there as often as possible. My story involves knowing myself, loving myself, backing myself, allowing myself mistakes, and taking a growth mindset: it’s all learning, it’s all development, there will be falls or blocked paths, but with each blocked path is a secret door that will open. I’m newly offering one-on-one coaching and would love to offer you a session free of charge. Send me a PM via Facebook or [email protected] to set it up.
      PS. Remember FEAR = False Expectations Appearing Real xx

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